The Wrong Story

Not so sure about this one. I'm afraid it comes off like I'm making fun of trans people and their possible triggers or drag queen story time in general. That absolutely wasn't my intention, and I hope that's not what comes across. The only poking fun I think is okay is that directed at going down the rabbit hole with literary interpretation. 

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"She changed the story? What do you mean she changed the story? They're not supposed to change the stories," Ellen. "It's not fucking drag queen Beat poetry improvisation hour; it's drag queen story time. That's what you said."

Ellen, less confident in her stride, struggled to keep up with her boss, Karen, as they walked and talked on their way to the County Commissioners' Meeting. 

"One of the parents filed a complaint," said Karen. "This isn't San Francisco; it's West Texas. I knew this was a bad idea. I should never have approved it." 

"It's not a bad idea!" Ellen responded sharply. "It's a wonderful idea. Story time is supposed to be entertaining, and the queens are entertaining. The kids love them! They don't see the multiplicity of the performance, and with any luck it will stay that way." 

Ellen held open the door for Karen, following after her as they entered the Keyes building where court was held, the wall of cold, conditioned air resonant against their skin as they stepped out of the merciless heat of Texas and into the carefully controlled environment of County government.     

"It's not her fault," said Ellen. "It's mine. I chose the wrong story. I should never have picked Little Red Riding Hood."

Karen moved away from the flow of people making their way to the meeting, stood motionless, and looked at Ellen silently, her arms folded in a "you've got two minutes" sort of way.

"Have you ever read it?" Ellen asked. 

"Of course I've read it," said Karen. "Everyone's read it. It's about a little girl taking tea and crumpets to Grandma only the wolf gets there first and sets a trap for her."  

"Everyone is familiar with it," said Ellen. "Everyone hasn't read it, but everyone thinks they've read it because Disney or Fleischer Studios or Warner Brothers or something, but that's not the same thing. Besides, it's not always what the book brings to the reader so much as it is what the reader brings to the book. 

"You're losing me," said Karen. 

"When does the wolf first come across Little Red Riding Hood?" asks Ellen. 

"At her grandma's house."

"No," replies Ellen. "That's later. He first sees her in the woods on her way to Grandmother's house. You'd think he'd gobble her up right there, but he doesn't. He sets off to Grandma's to setup an elaborate ruse that serves no obvious purpose."

"Isn't there a woodsman or something?" 

"No," replies Ellen. "That comes later too." 

"Maybe he isn't hungry yet."

"Ostensibly it's because he gets the idea of going for two for one, and by moving along to Grandma's house he'll get both of them. But he could have both of them anyway. Nothing prevents him from devouring her  and then moving on to get Grandma. Instead, he goes to grandma's house. When he gets there he consumes her and then, for no discernible reason, instead of just hiding behind the door, he puts on Grandma's clothes and crawls into bed."

"Why the ruse?" asks Karen.  

"Exactly. Why the ruse? Why hide at all for that matter? They're not in Texas. Little Red Riding Hood isn't armed. She isn't going to pull a hand gun out of her purse. There's no possibility of her getting the jump on him. She's defenseless."

"So why then?"

"The wolf needs Little Red Riding Hood to acknowledge her as a woman. She's been performing this exaggerated form of toxic masculinity her whole life in an attempt to hide her own inner truth from herself, and when she finally makes the decision to present her true self to the world, she starts with the most easily transformative act available to her--clothes. Grandma's clothes. And what does Little Red Riding Hood do? Does she embrace the wolf's newfound authenticity? No! She laser focuses on all the physical attributes trans women most fear giving them away. Her voice. The size of her hands." 

"She clocks her!" says Karen.

"Exactly!" replies Ellen.

"So the big, bad wolf is actually a trans woman, and Little Red Riding Hood is the villain, trying to force her back into heteronormative standards rather than embrace her as she truly is," says Karen.

Ellen nods. 

"And  our reader was triggered." 

Ellen nods again. "How could she help but be?"

"Ellen."

"Yes." 

"What about how the wolf was trying to, and I believe actually did, eat both of them?"

"Symbolic, of course," said Ellen. "Many cultures including some Native Americans believe one takes on the spirit of the deceased by consuming the flesh. It's an act of appropriation, not aggression."

"Of course," said Helen. 

Karen looked at her watch. 

"Okay, we've got to go in now. Let me do the talking, okay?"

"Okay," said Ellen.

They made their way into the crowded room and onto metal folding chairs spread just far enough apart as not to be touching. 

"Karen," Ellen whispered into her boss's ear as the meeting began. 

"Yes?" 

"I don't want you to lose any credibility by not having the facts straight."

"Yes?"

"That part about Little Red Riding Hood bringing tea and crumpets to Grandma?" 

"It's not tea," said Ellen. "It's beer."